๐Ÿฅ‡ Ranked by reputation, not by algorithm

Get judged by someone who's actually good at it.

Friends tell you it's good. Strangers tell you what to fix. Real, ranked people give you brutally honest, specific feedback โ€” in under 24 hours.

No AI judgment. No algorithm. Just people with a reputation to protect.

How it works

Three steps. Real human. 24 hours.

1

Submit

Upload your resume, deck, profile, or page. Pay upfront, tell us what to focus on.

2

Pick your judge

Different judges catch different things. Choose the lens you actually need.

๐Ÿ”ฅ Brutal ๐Ÿ’ผ Hiring manager ๐Ÿš€ Founder ๐Ÿ’ฐ Investor
3

Get roasted

A ranked roaster claims it and sends back specific, actionable fixes โ€” typically within 24 hours.

1. What are you submitting?
2. Who's judging?
Your roast: ๐Ÿ“„ Resume judged by ๐Ÿ”ฅ Brutal
$9
Categories

Not just resumes.

Submit anything you want a second, sharper opinion on. We open new categories as soon as we have roasters who can actually judge them well.

Live
๐Ÿ“„

Resume

from $9
Live
๐ŸŽค

Pitch deck

from $19
Live
โค๏ธ

Dating profile

from $9
Soon
๐Ÿ’ป

Landing page

notify me
Soon
๐Ÿ”—

LinkedIn profile

notify me
Soon
๐ŸŽจ

Portfolio

notify me
Soon
๐Ÿ’ก

Product idea

notify me
Soon
โœ‰๏ธ

Cover letter

notify me
Soon
๐ŸŒ

Personal website

notify me
Soon
๐Ÿ“‹

Job application

notify me
Pricing

Pay once. Get roasted once.

No subscriptions, no upsells.

Text Roast

$9
  • Written, specific breakdown
  • Line-by-line fixes
  • Delivered in ~24 hours
Get roasted

Video Roast

$39
  • Everything in Deep Roast
  • Recorded walkthrough
  • Watch them react in real time
Get roasted

โšก +$10 Rush โ€” jump the queue. Available on categories with enough active roasters.

The platform keeps 20โ€“30%. The roaster keeps the rest.

Reputation, not volume

Rank has to mean something.

A roaster who finishes 1,000 mediocre reviews shouldn't outrank someone who finishes 100 exceptional ones. So we don't let them.

JK
๐Ÿฅ‡ #1 Resume Roaster

Jordan K.

312
Reviews completed
4.94/5
Helpfulness rating
94%
Would recommend
67%
Returned for a 2nd review
๐Ÿฅ‡Jordan K.340 ยท 4.94
๐ŸฅˆSam R.211 ยท 4.88
๐Ÿฅ‰Priya N.176 ยท 4.91
4Marco D.98 ยท 4.87
5Aisha T.85 ยท 4.90
Before / After

This is what a good roast actually changes.

Before
"Responsible for managing projects and working with cross-functional teams to complete tasks."
After
"Led a 7-person cross-functional team to ship [X] three weeks ahead of schedule, cutting release cycle time by 30%."

Roasted by #4 Jordan K. ยท Resume, judged by ๐Ÿ’ผ Hiring manager

FAQ

Questions

Both, on purpose. A roast without a specific fix isn't a good roast โ€” and reputation score is exactly why bad ones don't stay ranked.

Real people who already do this critique work, now with a reputation on the line instead of doing it for free on Twitter.

Typical delivery is under 24 hours. We don't promise a hard SLA yet โ€” we'll add a guaranteed window once we know we can consistently hit it.

Join the waitlist for that category. We open new ones as soon as we have roasters who can actually judge them well โ€” not before.

Never without your permission. We only publish before/after examples from people who opt in to share.

Still writing "responsible for managing projects" and hoping for the best?

Get roasted โ€” from $9